Time to Bloom

Today...more like this last week...I have lost sight of my first love. (Rev 1) Not just in the sense He was the one I loved first, but also in that He is the one I should love first above all else. I should love Him supremely above all else.

So what does that mean when I get so busy and my quiet time is one of the first things to get cut down? When I let all the busyness of a hectic scheduele, homework/school, keeping up relationships, entertainment (internet, fb, etc.), and everything else become my focus. Not to mention the stress, worry, and insecurity that quickly ensues making those things my focus.

I realized that is what it all comes down to, I have forgotten my first love. Maybe not completely forgotten but definitely lost sight of. May the battle begin, fighting to keep Him my first love, in every sense of the phrase. And of course when I give Him the rightful place in my life, everything else falls into formation. Sound familiar? "Seek first the kingdom and righteousness and all these things will be added to you..." I should read my bible more and actually take what it says literally.

Perhaps this is right where He wants me. In the middle the unknown juggling more things than I care to deal with. I feel like I am doing too many things to really do them all right. I am not studying and reading as much as I should be to do my best in school. I am not studying my notes and bible for residency as much as I would like to. I don't have enough time to invest in the relationships around me that I want and need to. At work I am to tired from long days to do it with all my heart and work to the best of my ability. And my time with the Lord, just seeking His face, is often reduced to not a whole lot of face time and trying to make it okay with worship music in the car on my commutes. But maybe this is right where He wants me. I have felt His call on my life. I am not sure what it pretains too or where it will lead, but I feel it's weight. Maybe now it is time for the process to make me more usable for that call. And perhaps that means I am right where He wants me and it is time to bloom where I am planted. Time to learn diligence and time management. Time to make my priorities not in question. Time for a lot of things...

Mostly just time to bloom.

There is freedom in adoration. Love Him best and first and everything else falls into place.