I should be sleeping. But it's pouring rain outside. And I have the house to myself and a down comforter and Tenth Avenue North quietly on shuffle.

And there are a million and a half things to distract me. And when there isn't laziness wins almost always. But I'm not a lost cause. And there is so much growth that needs to happen and changes that need to be made and breaking and restoring. And I keep trying to fix it myself, or at least earn it, or just give up and accept defeat and shut off.

But not tonight. Tonight, tonight it's just the beginning. Tonight there is hope. And tonight I just want to lay in bed, cuddled under my covers, listening to the rain. Listening to Him sing how much He loves me. Listening to Him wash my heart clean with songs that have come to mean so much to me. And just be with Him.

That's it. I don't want to sleep. I just want to be with Him.

He's pretty great ya know? And I have zero answers for my coworkers and pretty much anything else. And I prayed one of the most honest prayers ever the other night. And it felt good. Until I did nothing about it for the next three days.

Anyway, I don't even know why I'm posting this or if any of it makes sense. But this is just a really good moment. I loved the magical city lights twinkling at night as I landed in DFW and I really love being curled up under my covers listening to the rain and just being with Him.

That's all for now. Lot's ahead this year. But for now, that's all.